Mr. Cassady: U.S History Leadership Student Council Youth & Law

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MURPHY'S LAW

Murphy was an optimist

*No good deed goes unpunished.

*Leak proof seals - will.

*Self starters - will not.

*Interchangable parts - won't

*There is always one more bug.

*90% of everything is crud.

*If you're feeling good, don't worry, you'll get over it.

*All warranties expire upon payment of invoice.

*Where you stand on an issue depends on where you sit.

*Never eat prunes when you are famished.

*Friends come and go, but enemies accumulate.

*If you try to please everybody, nobody will like it.

*A short cut is always the longest distance between 2 points.

*Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.

*You will always find something in the last place you look.

*The chance of a piece of bread falling with the buttered side down is
directly proportional to the cost of the carpet.

*No matter how long or hard you shop for an item, after you've bought it, it
will be on sale somewhere cheaper.

*No one's life, liberty, or property are safe while the legislature is in session.

*The other line always moves faster.

*In order to get a loan, you must first prove you don't need it.

*Anything you try to fix will take longer and cost more than you thought.

*If you fool around with a thing for very long you will screw it up.

*A $300.00 picture tube will protect a 10 cent fuse by blowing first.

*If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.

*Any tool dropped while repairing a car will roll underneath to the exact center.

*The repairman will never have seen a model quite like yours before.

*When a broken appliance is demonstrated for the repairman, it will work
perfectly.

*A pipe gives a wise man time to think and a fool something to stick in his mouth.

*Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will use it.

*Everyone has a scheme for getting rich that will not work.

*In any hierarchy, each individual rises to his own level of incompetence, and
then remains there.

*You will remember that you forgot to take out the trash when the garbage
truck is two doors away.

*The race is not always to the swift nor the battle to the strong, but that's
the way to bet.

*There's never time to do it right, but there's always time to do it over.

*When in doubt, mumble, when in trouble, delegate.

*Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral or fattening.

*It is morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money.

*A bird in hand is safer than one overhead.

*Murphy's golden rule: whoever has the gold makes the rules.

*Everything east of the San Andreas fault will eventually plunge into the
Atlantic Ocean.

*Nature always sides with the hidden flaw.

*The light at the end of the tunnel is the headlamp of an oncomming train.

*Beauty is only skin deep, ugly goes to the bone.

*To know yourself is the ultimate form of aggression, Freudian Psychology.

*Never play leapfrog with a unicorn.

*If everything seems to be going well, you obviously don't know what is going on.

*If more than one person is responsible for a miscalculation, no one will be
at fault.

*In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.

*Never argue with a fool, people might not know the difference.

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Mr. Cassady: U.S History Leadership Student Council Youth & Law

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