*ATTENDANCE AND PUNCTUALITY
Make sure your child attends school every day and arrives on time. This
helps him to be more focused and organized. Also, he doesn't miss important
class instruction that cannot be replaced. In addition, getting ready for
school promptly and arriving at the expected time every day help establish
good habits and promote responsibility.
*HOMEWORK TIME
Preferably, homework should be completed immediately after a snack or a
little break after arriving from school, but before preferred activities
(e.g., television). For children with learning or attentional problems, you
may consider a number of short homework periods in the early afternoon
interspersed with preferred activity times. A daily plan can be communicated
to your child by a written or tape recorded list of activities specifying
times to be spent on homework, chores, and preferred activities. Homework
time should not be assigned late in the evening or when your child is tired.
Set aside a regular time and location for study. Give homework its own
special time and place. You may want to involve your 4th or 5th grade child
(certainly with some limits) in finding the schedule that works best.
Take it step by step. Particularly in the upper grades, sometimes children
get overwhelmed by the amount of homework they have to do. Encourage your
child to calmly figure out what needs to be done and how much time it will
take, and then create a plan. Help your child break each assignment down
into manageable steps.
Provide a quiet, well-lit environment. It's best to do homework in a room
that has good lighting and is relatively quiet. This reduces distractions
and helps to maintain concentration.
Allow time for some after-school fun. Students need to take a break from
academics. A healthy balance between work and free time will not only
contribute to better performance, but will also help your child develop
valuable time-management skills.
Help out. You shouldn't have to do your child's homework or reteach the
material covered in class, but you can help out by showing an interest,
making yourself available as a resource and by encouraging independent
problem solving. For example, if your child is doing a project on
presidential elections, point out related articles that you've come across
in the newspaper. However, if your child is having great difficult
completing homework or a special project, contact the teacher immediately.
Praise a job well done. Kids, no matter what their age, need to know that
they are doing a good job. Be vocal about their successes and encourage them
to keep up the good work (especially as the year draws to an end and a
tendency toward laziness may settle in). A little praise will go a long way
in building confidence and healthy study habits.
Share concerns with the teacher. If, at any point in the year, your child
seems to be losing motivation and you've exhausted all attempts to
reinvigorate him, share your concerns with the teacher. You'll want to
determine if the problem is the quantity of homework, the assignment itself
or your child's attitude toward school. An open dialogue with the teacher
goes a long way in avoiding potentially serious problems.
*PRAISE OFTEN
There's more than one way to acknowledge your child's efforts,
encourage him to keep up the good work, and boost his self-esteem.
These are some words that will show encouragement:
1. Good for you!
2. Superb.
3. You did that very well.
4. You've got it made.
5. Terrific!
6. That's not bad!
7. Couldn't have done it better myself.
8. Marvelous!
9. You're doing fine.
10. You're really improving.
11. You're on the right track now.
12. Now you've figured it out.
13. Outstanding!
14. That's coming along nicely.
15. I knew you could do it.
HELP YOUR CHILD TO BE SUCCESFUL AT SCHOOL
Teach your child 3 important skills:
SET GOALS: People who know where they are headed are more likely
to get there. Regarding to school, deciding to get good grades is the first
step. Next is figuring out what needs to be done. Sit down with your child
and talk about some goals for the coming year. Then break them down into
smaller steps. What can your child do today to help him/herself to reach
his/her goal?
PLAN AHEAD: Some people seem to take the unexpected in stride.
When it rains, they know where the umbrella is. Other people are
always amazed when things don't turn out as expected. The truth is that
things never turn out quite the way they are planned. Help your child
think ahead to be ready. You might say, "I know you are hoping to write
all your report this weekend. But what if the weather is nice? Then you
may want to play outside. You might want to start writing some of it today".
FINISH WHAT YOU START: Some kids don't mind writing the paper, but don't
proofread and edit. As a result, their grade is lower than it should be. At
home, they may wash the dishes and leave them for someone to put away. Help
your child get in the habit of following through on a project to the end.
PARENT NIGHTS
We are have parent nights at school to assist you in helping your child be a
successful student. Make plans to attend some worshops.
IT TAKES INVOLVED PARENTS FOR STUDENTS TO BE SUCCESSFUL AT SCHOOL
Here are 7 ways you can become involved in your child’s education that will
pay big dividends for both of you:
- Attend Parent-Teacher conferences with specific questions you want to ask.
- Meet your child’s friends and get to know their parents.
- Develop a consistent daily routine, including time for studying and
homework. Every student should have some chores or responsibilities around
the house.
- Let the school staffs know of your availability to volunteer in the
classroom or school.
- Voice your concerns on any issues that will affect your family.
- Vote in local, state, and federal elections for public officials who
support education. Communicate with them regularly so you are represented
well.
- Join your local PTA and lend your support to the school to benefit your
student. National PTA is a powerful voice for children, a relevant resource
for parents and a strong advocate for public education. Choose to make a
difference. Join the PTA today!
SEPARATION ANXIETY
What is separation anxiety?
It is the distress that children experience when their parents temporarily
leave them. Insecurity is the main reason for separation anxiety. Children
may be afraid that they will not "survive" if their parents are not close by
to take care of them. It normally begins between the ages of 6-9 months
old. It peaks around age 2, and should begin to decline gradually until
around age 3.
Can separation anxiety reoccur with elementary age children?
YES! It may reoccur in response to environmental changes and stressors. A
child who has attended and enjoyed school for several years may suddenly
become sick so that they can stay home. The usual complaint is, "I don't
want to go to school."
Is separation anxiety the same thing as "school phobia?"
NO! The term "school phobia is misleading. Clinical studies show that these
students are usually NOT afraid of teachers or the actual school building,
but are frightened to leave home instead.
What are early warning signs of separation anxiety?
*A child's reluctance to visit friends.
*A child's reluctance to play alone.
What can parents do to help ease the anxiety?
*Establish a consistent daily routine, so the child know details about
school, and where his/her parent will be during the day.
*Any action that reassures the child of the safety and security of their
family will help.
*Contact you school counselor to help assess the severity of the situation,
and to determine if there are potential sources of anxiety at school.
What causes separation anxiety?
In some cases, separation anxiety can be a biochemical reaction which may be
treated by a physician. Other severe cases may require counseling to help
deal with underlying fears.
When is it NOT separation anxiety?
Sometimes a resistant child may seem to have a problem with separation
anxiety when actually he/she is testing limits or trying to get their own
way. This is a CONTROL issue, not separation anxiety! Talk to your school
counselor to help assess the situation and to arrive at a discipline plan
that may relieve both parent and child of the power struggle.
***Adapted from "A Practical Resource for Elementary Counselors," by Janet
M. Bender, M.Ed.
GOOD CHARACTER AND RESPECT
As we consider ways to teach children respect, it is important to understand
that respect is not the same thing as obedience. Experts say that the best
way to teach children respect is to be respectful toward them.
Building respect for authority starts at home!
Make sure your children know that you love and respect them.
Explain that you have rules because you care.
Follow up and follow through.
Be CONSISTENT with consequences.
Teach your child respect for school and teachers!
DO:
--Get to know your child's teachers.
--Demonstrate respect for others by using a positive tone of voice, always
returning teachers' calls, talking about the importance of an education, etc.
--Monitor your child's school activites by making sure they are prepared for
school, asking about what they are studying, reviewing homework assignments,
and praising effort and achievement!
DON'T:
--Don't take your child out of school for vacations, shopping excursions, or
other non-medical reasons. It sends the message that school isn't important!
--Don't belittle the school. Kids will pick up on your attitude. If you
have concerns, work with the school to solve them.
--Don't tell your child not to follow a school rule.
--Don't take your child's word as gospel! When there's a problem, express
support for school staff until you can collect all the facts.
THE RESPECT KILLERS:
1. Don't focus on being your child's "pal." Children need parents who care
enough about them to set limits and enforce them. Be your child's friend,
but be their PARENT first!
2. Don't be your child's slave. Doing for children what they can do for
themselves undermines their self-confidence and self-respect.
3. Don't be a nag. Repeating yourself tells your child that he or she can
ignore you. Instead, ask you child if they understood what you said, and
hold them responsible for knowing the next time!
4. Don't try to be perfect. Your child will respect you more and learn from
you if you share with him some times when you were wrong and how you handled
it!
5. Don't pamper children. Pampered children often times feel that it's
their right to be served, and become angry with teachers and others that
don't meet their demands. They fail to learn what is expected of them in
life, instead of learning responsiblity!
Copyright@1995, The Parent Institute
DEALING WITH DIVORCE
For a child, when a parent dies, there is a death IN the family; when the
parents divorce, there is a death OF the family. Children of divorce go
through grief and mourning similar to bereaved children, yet face
circumstances that can make their life more complicated. As parents, we
need to minimize the impact of separation or divorce to ensure that the
child does not feel abandoned or unstable.
Emotional Responses of children when dealing with dicorce:
1. Regressive Behavior: Children may regress to an earlier developmental
level. Thumb-sucking, bedwetting, baby talk, or wanting to sleep with the
parent are indications that the child is having difficulty coping with the
situation. These regressive behaviors are adopted from a stage of
development when they felt more secure.
2. Denial: The child may reject reality by fantasizing that the parents
will get back together. An older child may try to create situations that
bring the parents into contact with each other in hopes that they will
reconcile. Both parents should work towards helping the child accept the
separation or divorce.
3. Hostility: Anger and hostility are a consequence of a child feeling
abandoned by both parents. Many times, the anger is directed to the
custodial parent for driving the absent parent away.
4. Physical Stress: Physical expressions of anxiety can include fitful
sleep, nightmares, diarrhea, urinary frequency, loss of appetite,
restlessness, and increase in pulse rate. A doctor treating thc child
should be informed of the separation or divorce.
5. Guilt: It is common for children to blame themselves over the divorce,
thinking that they must have done something terrible to make their parents
split up. Also, a child may feel that they should "side" with one parent,
which causes guilty feelings of divided loyalty.
6. Depression: To the child, the family unit has died, when there is a
separation or divorce. This is the expression of grief over their loss.
Grief or depression should not be taken as a sign of preference for the
other parent, but rather, encourage the child to open up and talk about his
or her feeelings.
7. Behavior Problems: Most children will exhibit some form of behavioral
problems at home and at school. The school counselor should be informed of
the separation or divorce.
.......from "Helping Children Cope With Loss' by Buz and Joanie Overbeck,
1995
*AYUDE A SU HIJO/A A TENER EXITO EN LA ESCUELA
FIJE METAS: Las personas que saben donde van tienen mejores
probabilidades de llegar. En la escuela, el primer paso es decidir querer
obtener buenas calificaciones, despues hay que pensar de que manera se
pueden lograr. Sientese con su hijo y hablen sobre algunas metas para la
escuela. Luego, dividanlas en pasos pequenos. Que puede
hacer su hijo hoy para alcanzar su meta?
PLANIFIQUE
Algunas personas parecen estar preparadas para todo. Cuando llueve,
ellos saben donde esta la sombrilla. Otras personas se sorprenden si las
cosas no salen como ellos planificaron. La verdad es que las cosas
muchas veces no van a salir exactamente como fueron planeadas. Ayude a su
hijo a pensar de antemano y estar preparado. Puede que ud. quiera
decirle, "Se que quieres escribir todo tu reporte este fin de semana. Pero
que tal si hace un dia precioso afuera y quieres salir a jugar? Quizas sea
mas conveniente de que aproveches que ahora tienes la oportunidad de
empezarlo y trabajar un poco en el".
TERMINAR BIEN LO QUE SE EMPIEZA
A algunos chicos no les molesta escribir reportes, pero no revisan lo
que han escrito. Esto resulta en una calificacion mas baja de la que
podrian tener. En el hogar, puede ser que ellos simplemente quieran
lavar los platos pero no quieren guardarlos. Ayude a su hijo a tomar la
costumbre de terminar los proyectos.
GET ORGANIZED!
"Mom, I can't find my math book!" "I don't have my lunch packed and my
bus is coming in one minute."
Sound familiar? For many kids just getting out the door in the morning
is a real challenge. You can help your child be successful at school by
helping him or her get organized at home. Here's how to tackle three
problem areas:
TIME: Some kids put everything off until the last minute. You can help
your child by blocking out regular times for study, play, and other
activities. Make a large calendar. Write down all of your child's
activities.
Then set a time for school work. Try to stick to the same time each day.
Your child will know she can't flop in front of the TV after school because
it is work time until 5.
SCHOOL THINGS: End those morning hide and seek games. Get a
big box and put it in a place where your child can't miss it. Things from
school go in the box as soon as the child gets home. As she finishes
homework, that goes in the box too.
EVENINGS: Get your child's day off to a good start. Take a few minutes
at night to lay out clothes for the next day. Pack a lunch and put it in
the
refrigerator. Pack the backpack. Make sure your child has a regular
bedtime.
!ORGANICESE!
"Mamá, no puedo encontrar mi libro de matemáticas!" "No he
preparado mi almuerzo y el autobús está por llegar!"
Esto le parece conocido? Para muchos chicos hasta salir
por la puerta en las mañanas es un reto. Usted puede ayudar a que su
hijo tenga éxito en la escuela ayudándole a organizarse en el hogar.
Aqui tiene como tratar con tres áreas problemáticas:
TIEMPO: Algunos chicos dejan todo para el último momento. Usted
puede ayudar a su hijo a organizar horarios regulares para el
estudio, los juegos y otras actividades. Haga un calendario extenso.
Escriba todas las actividades que su hijo tenga. Luego establezca un
tiempo para las tareas. Trate de seguir el horario. Su hijo así sabrá
que no puede ver la televisión enseguida de llegar de la escuela pórque es
la hora de hacer las tareas.
MATERIALES ESCOLARES
Ponga un fin a esas mañanas ajetreadas. Coloque una caja grande en
un lugar donde su hijo pueda verla facilmente. Su hijo ha de colocar
los materiales escolares dentro de una caja tan pronto llegue a casa. A
medida que termine las tareas, también ha de colocarlas en la caja.
NOCHES ESCOLARES
Comience el dia de manera positiva. Tome unos minutos por la noche
para preparar la ropa para el día siguiente. Prepare el almuerzo para el
próximo dia y póngalo en la nevera. Prepare la mochila. Y asegúrese
de que su hijo vaya a dormir temprano.
Adapted from Parents Make the Difference, Newsletter
Adaptado de Los Padres Hacen la Diferencia, Boletin Informativo
