"No matter how hard you try, you cannot baptize a cat."
"When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair."
"Never ask your 3 year old brother to hold a tomato - or an egg."
"You can't trust a dog to watch your food for you."
"Don't sneeze when you are getting your hair cut."
"School lunches stick to the wall."
"You can't hide a peice of broccoli in a glass of milk."
"Never wear polka dot underwear under white shorts -
no matter how cute the underwear is."
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Last Modified: Monday, May 11, 2009
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Last Modified: Monday March 17 2008
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